The Story of a Mom, a Wife a Small-Business-Owner-Hopeful (Happy Baby Designs) and a Craft Lover, trying to be present (not just exist) in my life with my children, my husband and myself. Follow along with me as I chronicle my crafting and business endeavors, my true life and some mommy moments along the way .


Monday, February 21, 2011

Raising a Gentleman

Think back to one of your favorite old movies. And I mean old like Cary Grant old, not like Sixteen Candles old. Don't you love the way the men were gentlemen? They courted, they brought flowers on dates, they opened the car door, they paid the bill. Is it just me, or has our Justin Bieber society lost the art of chivalry?

Now don't get me wrong (and please don't send me nasty comments about women's liberation), I'm the first to stand up for women's equality. I have a daughter and I want her to be afforded all of the same rights as her brother. I don't want her to even know what the glass ceiling is. I do not want her dreams to be limited by her X chromosomes. But I also want her to meet a man who will send her flowers for no reason at all, to offer her his jacket when she shivers and to hold the door open for her when they enter a building.

When my husband opens the car door for me rather than unlocking it from the inside while I wait "patiently" out in the cold, I don't see it as sexist. I consider it a sign of affection and respect.

So you can imagine how my heart swells with pride when my 3 year old son brings flowers home to me. Whenever he goes to the grocery store with my husband, he tells his daddy, "let's buy mommy some flowers." And I have to give my husband credit for allowing our son this gesture of love rather than telling him they cost too much money or whatever excuse we tell our children when we don't want to buy them what they're asking for. It says to our son that buying those flowers is meaningful. And that little lesson is helping to teach him how to be a gentleman.


Despite the Justin Beiber society we are raising our children in, I hope my son grows up to be a strong, independent, loving, gentleman. And I hope your sons grow up to be the same because I want nothing less for my daughter...in about 30 years ;)

8 comments:

  1. Becs, I couldn't agree with you more. For all of my dating life and married life, J has always opened the car door (a little lax now since he usually puts S into the carseat and I fend for myself). Many people gave me a hard time, but in reality, like you said, it was a way to show appreciation and affection. I am one of those bra burning chicks but having a simple thing like door opening doesn't faze me a bit. I pray all the time that S will find a man just like that. The good thing is that she sees her daddy doing it and hopefully she will have that expectation as well.

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  2. Oh I totally agree! I just have a daughter and I want her to marry a gentleman like her dad. And should I have sons I definitely plan on teaching them what it means to be a real man.

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  3. That's wonderful, Rebecca. When I hear people who do not practice the social graces within the family lamenting the state of things, I think "C'mon people, it all starts at home!"

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  4. Hi Rebecca! I'm finally getting around to visiting everyone in the Circle of Bliss! Better late than never is usually my motto! :-) I agree on both sides...I have bothe sons and daughters! :-)
    I'm looking forward to reading your blog. I've signed on to follow!
    Have a wonderful week!

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  5. i totally agree! my son is very sweet and affectionate, and always minds his manners. i really hope he stays a gentleman. he loves his mommy, and always kisses and hugs me hello, good morning, good night, and good bye. i hope one day when he is married in the very very far future, he does the same for his wife.

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  6. I couldn't agree more- There is nothing wrong with raising gentleman and ladies- who can still be strong and successful.

    I am a new follower from the circle of bliss. Looking forward to seeing more.
    -Laurie
    http://www.littlebluechairs.com/

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  7. I agree with you, too. I have a soon-to-be one-year-old son who WILL know what it means to be respectful of women, his elders, etc. I sincerely hope that society swings our way and that more little boys grow up with these values.

    Your bunting obsession helped me to make one of my own for little boy's upcoming birthday party, too. :) Thanks!

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  8. That is so sweet Rebecca! Very well written post. :-)

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